Rebekah Poppen

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Lifestyle blog by Rebekah

 
 

Feeling Stuck.

 

We have all been there haven't we? We work at a job where we are unhappy. We waste away hours and hours doing something that leaves us on "E". I was there and I didn't get through it alone. I am no longer "stuck" and I am finally doing something that I love for a job. There are many things that led me to a job where I felt stuck and there were many things that help me let go and feel free.

I was always told I never really had a choice of going to college. My parents pushed me to succeed and I am thankful for that. Growing up I was told that I needed to go to college to get a good paying and secure job, who wasn't told that?! So I went to school and I got a degree in Business Management.. no, not a doctor. I needed to follow my dreams somehow! I wanted to be a small business owner, particularly a Bridal Store owner. I was recruited on campus by Target to be an in-store assistant manager-- or an Executive Team Lead. I was excited because the pay was good and then I didn't have to worry. I remember crying everyday the very first week, not because I am a baby... although I kinda was then. I knew it wasn't right, I felt it in my gut. 

But, I didn't leave. I listened to my friends and family who told me it would get better. It didn't, I still cried weekly when I felt like I couldn't give anymore. I stayed there for a little over a year. I was in deep because I absolutely LOVED everyone that I worked with. I felt like I couldn't leave because I was depended on, I didn't want to disappoint the people I loved so much.

The decision to leave was a harder decision than the decision to stay. My wedding was quickly approaching and that put a lot in perspective for me. I realized how this job was effected more than just me. I didn't see my family much, I wasn't giving 100% of myself to my friends and family because and what hurt the most was seeing how much it hurt Jonah. He was the one that had to be the shoulder for me to cry on every week and sometimes everyday of the week. It was really hard for me to realize that I wasn't just making myself suffer but I was hurting my friends and family. 

I hit my breaking point and decided that I couldn't stay there and be the wife, daughter, sister or friend that I wanted to be. I was filled with shame because I felt like I was abandoning so many people that depended on me at work. However, I felt a huge weight lifted off my shoulders. I finally gave it to God and let go. And amazing things happen when you give it to God.

I quit without having a back-up plan. I saw a position for a Social Media Specialist and filled out the application. I didn't think I was qualified but I knew I would give it 100%. I interviewed and to my amazement I got the job! God creates amazing things from nothing. I have been working for Panther Distillery doing Social Media since the end of September and I couldn't be happier. Sometimes Jonah and I reflect on how different our lives were just a year ago and I feel comfort in knowing I made the right choice. 

I am not saying to quit the job that you hate and see how it works out. What I am saying is to give it to God. Pray and then pray again. It's OK to put yourself first sometimes. Listen to your gut, take chances! Nobody deserves to feel stuck.